Middle Schools are not as cliquey as young adult fiction make it out to be. Or at least my middle school isn't. It is true that my middle school has groups, but those groups tend to mesh and are not extremely excluding. That is not to say we don't have outcasts. We do. They are the ones that fit into the typical middle school scenario.

Young adult fiction often portrays middle schools as a war ground of cliques, where one select group reigns and makes every one else feel miserable. I think that is a bit extreme. There are, of course, personality clashes, and groups of friends who don't get along with other groups of friends. But there isn't an organized battle ground, and no one clearly defines which side of a battle they are on.

Of course, other middle schools may be more cliquey. I think mine is spared because it is quite large (485 students over three grades), and is fairly diverse. (We have three major ethnicity groups; blacks, hispanics, and whites). Each ethnic culture has different status symbols, so there isn't one "popular" group. There is more of a "popular" gaggle, with multiple add-ons.

Insulting is an art. Middle Schools hold experts.

The Worst Type of Insult

A Compliment.

A compliment, when delivered earnestly, leaves the prey absolutely unguarded. It is hard to react to. You could say 'thank you', but you run the risk of having the taunter think you believed his compliment. You could say something back, but, most often, the kids who get teased aren't the ones who talk back. If they do, it seems flustered, and you don't want to seem bothered. Most kids just stand, looking lost and defeated.

Since kindergarten, I and my classmates have been told how to solve a conflict using a step-by-step process. First, you take a breath and count to ten. Then, you calmly state your feelings (I feel mad that you broke my crayon, I felt sad when you insulted me, ect.). You resolve the argument by deciding what each person could do to prevent the conflict from happening again.

I have never been told what to do if the person I am confronting does not listen. I have never been told what to do if the person I am confronting laughs in my face.

My Self-taught Conflict Solution

Avoid the Conflict.

Don't spend emotion on anyone but friends; they're the only ones who will listen. Everyone else; tell them to go away and get on with your life.

A Description of Middle School Volleyball

It does not look like volleyball.

Volleyball is a foreign sport. Arms are swung out like baseball bats and balls are slam-dunked over the net. There is even the occasional soccer kick. Only the core group of volleyball girls really know how to play. And even then, it is a rare occasion when they get to touch the ball. When someone fails to hit the ball over the net, everyone choruses there name in unison (generally followed by insults). It is quite strange- most of the chorusers are the slam-dunkers.